YOU DO YOU
Your life is the picture you paint and want it to be, and cannot, nor should it be, compared to anyone else’s. You choose the colors and designs, messages you want to convey, the viewers you want to attract, the start and finish of one piece of work then the next. In no way am I an artist. I never will be. However, I admire the work other people create. Now, I would like to share my next metaphor, you are your own masterpiece, whether you like art or not. In a world full of comparison: you have to look like this, talk like this, have this many likes/comments/followers, eyebrows perfect, makeup on, perfect portrayal of life, great home life, lots of materialistic things...that’s not conducive to your life nor what you should base your painting off of, or even make such a strong effort to portray. Your life is a picture that YOU paint. You can paint a rainbow sure, but just as fast you could paint a storm. It’s so easy, especially in this modern day, for you to feel like you’re competing with everyone, but you are not. It’s so easy to feel like everyone is negatively judging your piece of art, but they are not, at least not the people who truly understand your painting and the depth that lies beyond the outside appearance. Looks in a painting may say something but your message (heart and personality) say more. Anyone can fake a good painting, make a fake story up, but the difference is, people fall in love with the personality behind the painting, the message it’s trying to convey. Life is a blank canvas and I have no art ability whatsoever, but I respect art because the underlying purpose it relays is that everyone is different and has different taste. Some people may like your art, some may strongly dislike. However, artist, I assure you, do not care what others think about their work. They care about what it means to them and if people like it or not, so be it.
This is how I live life, how I hope you realize you should. No artist compares their work to Da Vinci just like any artist should not. We wouldn’t have modern artists who are beyond impeccable (even songwriters included), if they spent their whole lives trying to match up to someone who was successful and expressed their style in a different way.
This is true with your life also. Your perfect life is not the same in someone else’s mind. It’s a hard concept to grasp, I know, but it’s a realization that needs to be made. You will always have people criticize your work/life, and that is okay. Did the best artists let other peoples views effect them? No. That is why they are great. Your life doesn’t have to fit what you think is everyone else’s ideals. It’s your life, let it fit your ideal. The happiest people I know wear what they want, look how they want, talk how they want, without worrying about being judged. Why does it matter what you say or do? It’s your life. Yes there are limits to set and standards to have for yourself, but in the end it’s what makes your heart feel fulfilled. I have been around every type of person from genuine to not so genuine from loving to super judgmental, and I have maintained my personality and love through it all. A lot of people quote, “love wins it all”, okay, you say that, but are you truly practicing what you preach? Love wins is a short word that can be powerful to some but there’s no depth in just that phrase. Love wins by action, respecting people’s views, talking to strangers, forgiving and trusting others, accepting that no one is perfect, knowing no one ever will be, even just smiling at someone who you know needs an uplifting gesture...that is what love wins means, and it can be circulated back to this original comparison of your art is your art, you made it, designed it how you wanted it to be and whether people respect what makes you happy or not is not of importance, but you showing people the same love you want in return is. Your work should be perfect in your eyes, your life should be perfect in your eyes, the love you express should be REAL love and by all mean if a short quote conveys the message or maybe a definition of love does the trick, then pick YOUR best option.
Beyond showing love, however, you have to show yourself love too. Appreciate and respect your own canvas, without hesitation. I cannot express enough how important it is to not wait on the approval of this world to paint your picture. No one is you. You have to accept that judgement is there, hateful people are there, mean people, narcissistic people, people who would so badly see you fail are present. The key? Do not stop creating your original masterpiece. Everyone is trying to paint this perfect picture and it seems hard, but it really is the most simple thing. Do what YOU want. Do what YOU need to do. If you don’t have a crew following behind you, still do it. One of the greatest misconceptions about life is that you need 100% support from everyone and the world’s approval, but that is highly inaccurate. You need your approval and then roll with it. There’s always room for hate, but you know what? There’s more room for love. You have to choose to conform to everyone else’s ideal life or choose to be who God made you to be. The most successful people in the world do not go around telling others they could be better or they wish they did this, had this, did that, oh it’s too late for me to change now...No, they accepted that the past, present, future is what makes their art so valuable and in return, they are happy just to see that they are doing something for a change in their own personal life that hopefully will positively change others live by being real and original.
It is a challenge, I know, and I have personally struggled emotionally and, even physically, when I thought I had to be this perfect version of who I thought everyone else wanted me to be. BUT, do you know how easy life became when I realized I would never be happy until I appreciated what it meant to be my own artwork. My own self. Even more difficult, realizing that I would never gain approval from everyone. And even more challenging than that, appreciating that people would leave my life once I refused to change my painting. I say appreciate because why would you want someone to critique your work of art when it’s yours to begin with? That is something to appreciate.
You truly learn the power of your life and the control you have over an infinite amount of situations once you accept who you are and what YOU need, what YOU want, what YOU love.
The point of this blog post is for me to be open with you all about the risks you must take to create or do what YOU want in life, not what everyone else expects you to do or be. If you love talking (like anyone who knows me) then talk peoples' ears off! (What I do daily). I cannot express the amount of disapproval I have had my whole life for being so social but you know what I listened to when people criticized me? Nothing. Ever since I was 3 years old I’ve been called loquacious and my response? "That’s not English", because, first off, I did not know what that word meant at the time and secondly, I did not mind because socializing has always been what makes me happy. I was so happy being myself that I could throw their comments to the part of my brain that did not process information short or long term, like most negative things. In fact, I take it as a compliment when people say, “oh you’re overly friendly” or that I do talk A LOT. The best part is I’ve come to realize that people will always, maybe not directly, but even more so, INDIRECTLY try to bring you down that leads you to overthink what you said, didn’t say, what you did, didn’t do...and you should never accept that that is how you should allow yourself to feel. You are your own masterpiece. If you allow yourself to worry what others think or how they will react, then how will you ever create your own work of art, your masterpiece? Whatever you love, your passion, your painting, your way of living in this world, it is your creation. You should be proud that you have the ability to impact other peoples lives that, I hope, is in a positive way. You have no idea how small a word of encouragement effects other peoples’ life’s. You can choose to love others, as in actually love not just say you love people, but actually go out of your way to improve someone's day.
If you do not feel worthy to publish your masterpiece then it’s time to come to a new realization. You CAN change just one person's day. Choose to be you, love what you love, love who you are, who you see in the mirror, work on improving your piece, how you view yourself. Work on being positive, stop comparing and start living. When you do make this shift, I just want you to know that you WILL have haters, jealousy is the only word I could strongly correlate with that. You WILL have bad days where you don’t feel your work is good enough, that’s LIFE. But, more importantly you WILL feel FULFILLED. You won’t always have people supporting you but for me, God is my palette and I try to paint my picture for him. My goal in my life is NOT to be top notch, the perfect “wanna be” idol. No. I want to live my life to support and motivate others to be the best they can be and what I paint reflects less of what everyone’s expectations were of me, and more on the fact that I care about what you see in this painting. Do you see love? Do you see a heart that is genuine? Do you see a light when you thought only darkness remained? And even if you aren’t as strong of a believer in God as I am, I think there is always a sense that you’re living life right when you can say that your picture made someone else’s day.
You should live life under your terms not the way this world wants you to conform to be, but also, a strong correlation to a perfect painting is loving everyone else’s work, just as much as yours.. The same love you want back from everyone else is the same love you should give. If someone judges your work, still show them love. It is a battle, we all know, but the difference between Da Vinci, top artist, producers, entrepreneurs...they did not change their lives to construct what society paints as the perfect picture. Oh no, they did not believe in comparisons, who is better, who had more tickets bought for their show...instead, they stayed true to what THEY believed in, and in return, people LOVED their work.